Coffee with Mary Cressler

Fifty Cups of Coffee Chat #18: Mary Cressler
Date: May 4, 2024
Location: Lake Tahoe, Nevada – during a blogger retreat!

How we know each other

Mary and I first met several years ago, most likely at a local food and wine event, and we’ve been on a few different wine press trips together around the Pacific Northwest over the years.

What Mary is doing now

Mary is the founder of Vindulge, a successful food and wine blog. She and her husband Sean Martin are also the co-authors of the gorgeous Fire + Wine cookbook, creators of a delicious red wine BBQ sauce, and the team behind Ember & Vine BBQ Catering and Events. You can find them cheffing it up at various food and wine events around the country. They are also currently working on their second book, and I personally am so excited for that to come out in 2025!

Three questions

During these Fifty Cups of Coffee chats, I ask each person the same three questions. The reasoning behind each is as follows:

Question 1 – Social media makes it easy for other people to think that they know us, when truthfully, we all only see a small sliver of someone’s life and who they really are. This is the interviewee’s chance to share something that is important to them that, for whatever reason, other people may not know.

Question 2 – We all have fears, no matter who are are or where we are in life. This helps connect us and show we are all more alike than we are different.

Question 3 – I believe the answer to this question helps show each person’s true values, passions, and their why in life.

There are no right or wrong answers to any of these. I’m including each person’s answers in first person. Their answers have been edited from my notes for length and clarity, but these are their words.

What is one thing you wish more people knew about you?

“That I’m a closet thespian. I come across more shy and introverted. I’m the introvert; Sean’s the extrovert. But when nobody’s around I’m singing and dancing. I love music, I love singing and dancing. I never do it in front of people but it brings me so much joy. I wish my family was more on board with my love of music and theatre – it just soothes my heart and brings me so much joy. If I could do anything else in my career, I would be a broadway star.”

“Also, I used to drive a bus. I was a bus driver. I was the YMCA summer camp director and all directors had to get their CDL (Commercial Driver License) in San Francisco. So I used to drive a 65-passenger bus. I could parallel park that thing better than anything.”

What is your deepest fear?

“Probably like most people, I am deeply afraid of losing my kids. My kids are my everything. Like a lot of parents, I have so much anxiety around my kids and anything happening. When giving birth, they couldn’t remove the placenta and they had to do emergency surgery. It all happened really fast. The placenta attached itself to my uterus and so they had to remove my uterus. I was bleeding out and they said we have to give you hysterectomy right now. They knocked me out, and I woke up hours later. I had to have a blood transfusion – 5 liters of blood.”

“It was a traumatic experience, but for me, I was so overwhelmed with gratitude that I didn’t die – and I had these two perfect little babies and they didn’t have to go to the NICU. But I didn’t let anyone drive them until they were about 5 years old. Since then I’ve been doing a lot of work on my own personal anxiety – like waking up at 5 to do yoga and meditate. But my biggest fear is really losing the people I love.” 

If you had unlimited funds, what would you do with your life?

“First thing I’d do is take my whole family on trip to Greece. My mom’s dream is trip to Greece, and I’d love to take her before too much time passes. She loves cruises and I’d take her and all my sisters and their kids on a massive amazing trip to Greece visiting as many islands as we can.”

“Then I would love to set up some sort of scholarship. I went to school on scholarships; I was the first generation to go to college. I’d love to set up scholarships for kids. And I’d also love to set up a scholarship or something to help small business owners launch their businesses securely, without a fear of losing it all, or losing their homes.”

“Maybe a hot tub, sauna, steam room, and a lazy river at my house. I do love where we live but I would love to have a house somewhere warm and beautiful, like Hawaii in winter.”

“Then the rest of the time I would love to give back to various philanthropic organizations.”

Lessons Learned

It’s always great to chat and catch up with Mary! I learned a lot during this brief coffee chat. Here are my biggest takeaways:

• There is always so much more to every person you meet than meets the eye. I mean, I’ve known Mary for years, but I had no idea about her love for musical theatre, or her San Francisco bus driving days. I loved learning these things about her, and I adore when these little surprise nuggets present themselves during these interviews. They’re one of my favorite parts of this project!
• The fear of losing our kids unites all parents. I don’t think I’ve interviewed one parent who did not mention this fear. Even if it wasn’t the main fear they wanted me to highlight, we all shared our visceral, deep fears of losing our kids. No matter what, our love for our kids as parents unites us.
• Lean into gratitude. Mary’s childbirth experience was truly traumatic, but I admire how she focused on her gratitude for living through it and having two amazing babies as the result. And I’m so grateful to the doctors and nurses who worked quickly to save Mary during that time! I think sometimes traumatic life events can easily cast a shadow on the rest of our lives if we let them, but there is, truly, always something to be grateful for. And if we lean into that gratitude, more and more, it helps shine a light over any darkness.
• Wealth and travel are best enjoyed with others. I love that the first thing Mary would do if she had unlimited funds would be to take her whole family to Greece because it’s her mom’s dream trip. Because what good is wealth and travel if not shared with those we love? I hope you get to take this family trip one day, Mary!

Thank you so much for taking the time to chat, and for sharing so much of your life here, Mary!

Learn more about Mary

Visit Mary’s website: Vindulge.

Check out her cookbook: Fire + Wine.

Follow Mary on Instagram

Follow 50 Cups of Coffee

Follow 50 Cups of Coffee on Instagram.

Visit my main website: Urban Bliss Life.

Learn more about me at MarlynnSchotland.com.